My name is Kaitlin and if you were to ask me my preferred mode of transportation my response would be a silver 2018 Subaru Forrester with orange detailing.
I love to drive in this car—it has rallied up well over 3000 miles in the last two years. I also love being alone while driving. I have full autonomy over the music, the temperature, the speed, and the destination. Having the ability to get myself from point A to B or meet up with a friend at any given point is truly a freeing feeling, however, I often forget the financial tolls the freedom is accompanied by. While the car can seemingly drive forever, granted there is gas in the tank, I do not have an endless supply of money to fill it up.
While driving provides a physical sense of fulfillment and gratification, being an outlet for my friends and peers provides me with an emotional one. Simply I feel great joy in knowing I am someone people can go to when they desire being heard. As with driving, I wish being a part of my friend support system was also something I could do without having some sort of toll accompany it. I wish I could listen, support, cheer-on, hug, cry, laugh, and console a friend at any given moment with a clear mind and full heart. I, however, am human and so are all of you, which means we need time to recharge. Much like my back burner concern regarding the financial toll constant driving takes, I often subconsciously disregard my own mental “bank account” if you will, midst of being a part of others support systems. I forget to take time for myself, reach out to my own support system, and remember that I, myself, am allowed to have off days.
Finding a balance in the things you love to do, regardless of what they may be, is essential to living a healthy lifestyle. Being mindful of the fuel you designate to the attention and time you give others is wildly difficult, but wildly necessary. A car cannot drive without gas, and acquiring gas requires money. You cannot be a support for those around you without being conscious of your own needs and that requires strength.
I leave you with this; do what brings you joy 100% of the time, but do remember to account for how much gas you’ll be burning through because every output requires an equal input in order to be sustained.
Now I am going to play a song that reminds me of a group of people who never fail to remind me of this message. Beige by Yoke Lore